Having Babies

The Law of Life and Love

Having all the children that God would give you is only one outworking of the law of Love. We are the children of a loving Father God who not only knows what's best for His children but is prepared to bless them accordingly. Our Father also is a holy God. There is no sin in Him and He is worthy of our trust and obedience.

Malachi 2:15 says: “Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.”

The Bible itself tells us that only God, through His Bible, can tell us how things really are (2 Timothy 3:16,17). The Bible tells us that reality is distorted by culture and sin as well as human pride (Psalm 19:7-11). Only the Bible faces reality completely and honestly (Deuteronomy 30:11-14). Bearing this in mind, we realize that only a Biblical worldview can provide genuine solutions to the problems that beset us in life such as when and whether to have children.

The challenge to the Christian then, is to face life through the lens of God's own revelation. But living according to Scriptural principles is unpopular in the church today because Scripture is not concerned with giving people the maximum freedom to do as they want, or feel is right, when they want. We know this is true because many Christians ignore the im- portance of specific Biblical commands, only obeying the ones they feel drawn to or that are stated so plainly that no-one can argue with them.

Middle Ages Mentality

The dominant attitude of Christians throughout the Middle Ages was that sexual love itself was evil and did not cease to be so if its object was one's spouse. Virtually all church fathers made statements praising virginity as superior to marriage – Jovinian was excommuned for daring to suggest that marriage was no worse in God's sight than virginity. Tertullian and Ambrose actually preferred to see mankind die out to its propagation through sexual intercourse.

Suffice to say that few today would share that worldview! Bear in mind, however, that these views are not in line with the whole counsel of God. Trying to please God by stressing some elements of relationship while despising others is an unbalanced approach. It is knowing better than God.

Puritan Mentality

Against this background we have the contrast of the much-maligned Puritans who declared the ideal of marriage for companionship. The ideal of friendship, largely confined to male friends in classical antiquity was now transferred to the marriage relationship. Their other revolutionary (and Scriptural) change was the endorsement of the goodness of sex in marriage. Everywhere we turn in Puritan writing we find affirmation of this principle. Married sex was not only legitimate but as Gouge taught, “married couples should engage in sex with good will and delight, willingly, readily and cheerfully.” The purpose of marriage and sex from the Scripture—seeing not only procreation, but companionship, was now enjoyed again.

When we talk about letting God plan your family, I now realize that many people think you're asking them to revert to a. view of marriage in which sex is only for procreation. Not so! It is the means of bonding people together in marriage, providing comfort, joy, pleasure, delight AND the blessing of children. God, after all purposed the entire package!

The Contraceptive Mentality

Given the blessings of marriage in which ALL Scriptural principals appear, what is the devil to do? Rob, steal and destroy, of course! Wherever the Law of Love stands, there is the liberty to disobey, so “companionship” or “pleasure” can become the focus of marriage, instead of a part of it.

This is certainly the case today in our modern society. People marry because they've “fallen in love,” not because they are ready to devote their lives to God and to each other. Even Christian couples plan to defer having children until they've had a good time “by themselves” first, and there is no clear teaching from the church to do otherwise. Without balance—what?

I've been to a few weddings recently in which children are prayed for but only when the couple want them and only the number the couple want. If children are seen as such a “minus” to life that they have to be regulated against with various pills, potions, and pesticides, with the church's blessing, then why would anyone in their right mind want to have a quiver full? Trying to please God by stressing some elements of relationship while despising others is an unbalanced approach.

People sometimes say to me that they've never seen a verse against vasectomy (not to mention family planning generally), in the Bible, yet God commanded us at creation and again after the flood to be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth. All through the Bible the case is presented on behalf of life and love in which children are a blessing and a reward; that married couples should not withhold from one another; that blessed is a man whose quiver is full of children; that barrenness is a curse (not to mention the fatal consequences suffered by Onan). One wouldn't think there needed to be any doubt (Genesis 38: 8-10).

Is it biblical illiteracy, ignorance, or foolishness to demand a verse saying family planning is wrong when there are countless verses clearly stating God's heart and intention on the blessing and desirability of babies? When the application of a general law is NOT in any reasonable doubt, as in this case, there is no need to make the law more specific. A few moments spent thinking about this will make it clear that the Bible couldn't take any other approach without becoming so huge and unwieldy that it wouldn't be able to be physically handled or printed! In any case, people usually don't want to see things in black and white from a practical consideration. They are usually playing spiritual games and employing delaying tactics, not looking for proof, anyway!

The “contraceptive mentality” is defended along humanistic lines, although often clothed in “spiritual sounding” language, e.g, “I know the Scripture says that, but God hasn't shown it to me personally yet”! Once a decision to rebel is made on “implied” issues such as this one, a yawning chasm appears. One can be deceived into ignoring even clearly stated principles.

Humanism has its own (diametrically opposed) code to help people handle complex modern situations, and unfortunately it is motivated by a very different spirit, a spirit we shouldn't have anything to do with! I would remind you that if you resisted this spirit, he would flee! This approach to problem-solving is called “Situational Ethics” and is antagonistic to God and His Word. Sadly, many Christians don't realize that they think and act according to this godless code.

The Scientific Mentality

The Billings teachings are clearly a compromise with Scripture. To attempt to solve a dilemma without taking heed to the clear instruction of Scripture is utter foolishness (Romans 1:18-23). It invites incompetence and inadequacy (Deuteronomy 28:15), and all attempts to do so are doomed to frustration and failure (Deuteronomy 30:15-20). So-called “science” simply cannot and will not work because it is out of touch with reality (Ephesians5:6), and fraught with fantasy (Colossians2:8).

Just as evolution as a theory is now widely understood amongst Bible believing Christians to be a fiction, so eventually will be the theory of fertility concerning conception. Just because God uses flood and weathering to shape His creation doesn't mean that what we see is the result of millions of years of water and wind erosion and deposit. Just because God uses cycles, sperm, and eggs shouldn't lead us to conclude that the gift of life is an inevitable result of unprotected sexual intercourse. Both creation and conception take “Intelligence” and are not, and were never, random acts of chance. God is Sovereign over His creation and over the creation of each new life.

I believe the Bible is the completed and final revelation of God to His children, and that, in its original autograph (as first written) was perfect.

The Uncompromising Mentality

I believe the Holy Spirit is calling our families to be a living testimony to obedience in a compromising world.

God is either Sovereign and opens and closes wombs, or He stands by, hands tied. The heart is deceitful above all things, and beyond cure, it says in Jeremiah. Who can understand it? As I don't believe we can trust our own hearts, we need to trust and obey God instead.

I would urge readers to get hold of The Way Home by Mary Pride. When I first read The Way Home, I was appalled to think I'd have to offer the Lord every part of my body and life but when you think about it, what sort of teaching had I had, that had allowed me to think it could be any other way? We make our bodies a living sacrifice. Do you know many people who actually do that? I didn't know anybody then, but I do now!

Again, let us not make the same mistake as has been made down the ages. Let’s not emphasize some elements of relationships while despising or ignoring others. We are no more saying that having many children makes someone godlier than someone who has few. We just want to encourage people to let God decide how many!

MAUREEN TULLY, Austraslia